I always said that I have dreams.. Dreams I want to pursue since I graduated from college. Before that, I didn’t even have a courage to think that I will make my way to college because of our economic issues. But, Luckily I have a broaden minded Mom. She never give up on me. on our condition. She said that economic never been our issues when it comes to education. I never late to pay my school fees by the way, despite the reality that on the other hand we have to manage our money tightly on clothes, house, food etc.
But since I got a scholarship to continue my study to university. I learn to dream BIG. I learn that we are able to reach anything… anything at all as long as we fight for it and pray.
I want to reach every corner of the galaxy..heheheee my galaxy name earth. I want to learn lots of things, from management, economics, engineering, renewable energy and the list goes on. I love to read. love to learn new things. because I just can’t stop thinking about lots of things. I just want to fly. to taste the bitter and sweet of life in the other part of this world, away from home. learn different culture. speak different languages.
And suddenly one day, my galaxy stop spinning. and my universe fading out. it stop. right in his eyes. he looks at me in his pure-beautiful-crystal eyes. and I freeze. right at that moment, the theory about time and space no longer relevant. the word of ‘me’, ‘my self’ no longer exist. I don’t even know what that is. The boy that could make me surrender on everything, my ‘BIG’ dream is fading. I don’t know what I want to do, what I want to achieve. as long as I can be there, beside him. everything will be fine. and I feel content that way. I feel complete.
But recently when I try to reminiscence the old days, about my glory-arrogant day where I am positive, 100% sure that I can conquer the world. when I read books about people who have the same dream as mine. I start to dream again. I long for another science, another tight schedule, lots of paper-work, another research and everything. I miss Uni life. I miss my dream. I miss my glory-arrogant self. finally I miss the old Retno Ires who swore to travel across the planet to find and learn lots of things. But still, He is the one who holds the key. anytime he is ready. I’ll make my way.
Because he is bigger than myself, bigger than my universe. Our little A.